Benediction for a Meltdown

May your tone remain calm 
and your reflexes cat-like
May your fount of patience be bottomless
and your hearing suffer no permanent damage 
May you take no insult too seriously
and remember
they don’t hate you
and you’re a good person 
and just this morning
she told you that you’re her best friend
May you know in your heart you are not a poop hot dog
and may you not laugh out loud when called one
May the neighbors remember their own children’s tantrums and ear-piercing screeches
and not call the police
even now as they wonder
alone in their houses
if their teens use birth control 
And may the neighbors hear your gentle pleading 
to please 
  wash your hands
  put on your socks
  let me brush your teeth
May they miss the moment when you break
and scream
eat one bite of dinner even a small one PLEASE JUST LICK IT FOR CHRIST’S SAKE
And as you beg this feral human
to take three slow breaths and tell you their feelings 
May you remember to breathe, too